Thursday, October 1, 2009


So, my hip has really been bothering me lately. Or, probably more accurately, my hip/pelvis/groin/upper inner thigh has been bothering me lately. And by "bother," I mean that the level of perturbance has varied along a range from:
* dull ache
** throbbing ache
*** stabbing painful ache
**** burning, sharp, breath-taking painful ache
***** absolute misery and inability to move my leg.

Sometimes it feels like my leg is getting sawed off right where it connects to my body; other times I feel like I'm re-enacting one of those Old English tortures where they pull you apart by your legs. Sounds pleasant, right? Ugh. It's very similar to the pain I felt right after my car accident in 2003, in which I broke my pelvis in a few places (among other injuries). After what seems to me like a minimal amount of physical exertion, I start to feel the tightening and aching that will eventually lead to a severe, sharp pain that makes me catch my breath. I end up limping my way over to a seat and then trying to rest or stretch or do whatever it takes to feel better. However, this becomes a touch difficult when I have a 9-month-old on the loose and ready to interact with me. How do I pick him up and carry him like this? How am I supposed to use the safety gate we installed-- the kind you climb over, of course? How do I help him walk around the house, or take him outside down the steps?


I know this seems like such a minor thing, and there are people out there who are dealing with much graver disabilities without one complaint, and that's what I'm trying to hold up like a banner in front of me. Besides, if I can't do this with a bum leg, how am I to expect my mother to be a Grandma while she's in a wheelchair and dealing with chronic pain? If she can do it facing those issues, I can do it facing mine!

Uh, right??

Anyway, I won't be getting any medical assistance with this anytime soon because we had to cancel my health insurance. At $189/month, it was surprisingly affordable, but with both of us in our current employment predicament it was just a luxury we couldn't afford. Not when formula costs just over $100/month, and diapers cost around $75/month, and then you have wipes and baby food and safety items and onesies and socks that actually fit him and so on and so forth... But there is my baby, crying for mama, so I'm done for now!

No comments:

Post a Comment