Sunday, January 10, 2010

To Try, or Not To Try... for Segundo

This is a big decision. We aren't planning on starting on an addition to our family until one of us gets a full-time job with benefits, but we'd both assumed that, once we got secure, we would go ahead and try for another bambino. The thing is, I'm hearing a lot of cautionary tales and questioning comments from people asking us if we're really sure, and I mean really, really sure, that we want another child. It wasn't really a question I'd seriously posed to myself; I just knew (know?) that I want more than one kid. I mean, if we'd met earlier and been able to start having children earlier in our lives, I'd probably want to go for three; at this point, though, I'm not willing to do more than one more pregnancy, because I'm not very thrilled about having babies after 40. That gives me about two more years, then, because at the end of this year I'll hit 38 and be qualified-- again-- as "advanced maternal age," lucky me.

The arguments people make include things like how much time we'd be able to give two kids, especially if both of us are working; how much money it costs to raise a child (especially meaningful when both of us are less than fully employed right now); how it will affect our lives as a couple; how it will affect us physically as we age with little ones; and so on. The thing is, most of the people who are offering up the "devil's advocate" position already had their kids a decade or more ago; they are our age, but parents of a ten or twelve year old. For them, I could see maybe not wanting to start all over with a newborn. For us, though, it's so recent that it's not a huge shift in perspective to think about having another baby. And we're already committed to raising Ethan, with all that goes along with that-- a change in how we take trips, or vacation, or go out on dates, or take on new jobs, and so on and so forth. We are already on that path; is it really that much harder to add another little one to the mix?

For now, I think we'll stick with the original idea, and start on our next bundle of joy as soon as we're able to... and I can't wait. How could I, after having such an awesome experience the first time? :)

Ethan Jan2010

2 comments:

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